The Trip to The Funeral

So the trip to the funeral actually went pretty well all things considering.  The trip down there began with us waking up at 6:30 in the morning, which is actually the normal time that I am used to getting up to prepare my husband for work.  He is really not a morning person in the slightest.  Which is probably why I was only able to get him up to start getting dressed ten minutes before we were supposed to leave at 7.

After the speedy dressing and bundling up, we were on our way.  A 45 minute drive down to my husband’s grandmother’s house (who I adore!), then the half hour wait for his sister to show up so that we would be able to follow her and successfully find this place, and then yet another hour and a half later and we had finally arrived.  It was an extremely boring trip as it was just me and my husband and we were both so sleepy at the time.  But, even though there really wasn’t much to do, the trip was rather nice and relaxing for me, just being able to spend some time with my husband with no interruptions.  It wasn’t quite as relaxing for my husband who had to keep up with his sister’s speed as we followed.  That was terrifying.  She drove nearly 90 mph.  Seriously.  I had never been in a car that fast before in my life.  Thank God that my husband is an excellent driver.

Then the funeral happened.  I won’t really go into detail about it as it was, you know, a funeral, but my husband did make me very proud.  He and his five cousins were paul bearers (Sorry if I didn’t spell that right I’ve never had to type that out before or read it anywhere) and they did great.  They were dressed nicely and each were calm and respectful (which is really saying something for our family).  The funeral itself was beautiful.  The casket was a pale blue, the preacher was in tears reminiscing, and there was a twenty-one gun salute, something that I had never seen before.  I am a bit ashamed to admit that I had to stifle a laugh when the guns rang and everyone woman there nearly jumped out of their skin.

The journey back to the church from the graveyard was different.  Unfortunately, we got lost.  My husband and I and three of his cousins got so completely lost.  It took us so much longer than anyone else to get back and we had to endure the dreaded call from my sister in law asking us what happened to us.  But we finally made it back after turning around twice.

We actually left without eating because my husband offered to get us sushi when we got back in our own town and there was no way that I could pass that up.  Sushi is my favorite food and he knows that.  The returning trip was so peaceful.  We were able to go our own pace and enjoy our time together. 

It took me a bit of time to get this all typed out because I really wasn’t sure how to describe all of it without going too into detail and making it sound too depressing.  I think I did alright.  My husband isn’t making it much easier either.  He is playing a computer game at the moment and it has begun to piss him off and so every few moments I can hear him cursing at the screen with everything he’s got.  So, if any of this sounds scattered I apologize.  And I blame my husband. 

I love my husband so much.

Be at peace and have a good night world.

B. McDaniel

A Time For Grieving

So, I plan on starting these blogs all off on happy notes, but that doesn’t seem to be able to be the case for today.  There has been a death in the family and we are going a few counties over to attend the funeral.  So, in lieu of the situation, I’m going to touch on some sensitive topics.  Death, more specifically for a child to deal with it.

When I was six years old, both of my mother’s parents passed away two months apart from each other and I had to go through the funerals.  Now, death is something that everyone on earth has to go through at one point or another, but at six, I had no clue what it really meant.  All I knew is that I wasn’t going to be able to see my grandparents ever again.

Then there was the actual funeral for both of them.  Seeing them both dead didn’t give me the closure that it does for some people.  All it gave me was more confusion.  I was only six, I had no idea why my grandparents weren’t moving or what had really happened to them.  Dealing with death for a child is a difficult experience.

Now, onto the reasons for my explanation, my son is only 7 years old.  Since he didn’t really know the deceased (his great-grandfather), we aren’t having him attend the funeral with us.  I know that some people would say that he should be there with us, but I would rather save him the pain of dealing with death at such a young age if I’m able.  I believe that a child should be able to just be a child for as long as they can.  Life hits you hard and fast and once it does, there’s no going back.

So, please keep us in your thoughts and prayers and I’ll return as soon as I can.

Enjoy life and have a good day.

B. McDaniel

An Introduction to Me

So, as I’ve never written a blog before, I’m not entirely sure if I’m doing this right or not.  Or perhaps there isn’t a right or wrong when it comes to these things.  I suppose that as long as its from me then it can’t be wrong, can it?  Oh, I hope not.

                Now, as a bit of an introduction, if you haven’t already noticed by the title of my blog, I will be writing down my experiences as a stay at home step momma.  In the early stages of my experiences I had so many questions and no one to give me answers.  I hope that I might be able to help at least someone with their own experiences.

                Alright.  In this first blog, I’m going to talk about my son.  Well, technically he is my step son, but in my eyes, he is my son.  I took a vow to be with my husband and his son came along with that vow.   I love and adore my son.  He is the most beautiful child that I’ve ever seen.  I dote on him a bit actually.  We pretty much get him anything he asks for (within reason of course). 

We get my son every other weekend at the moment because of school and the distance to his mother’s house but come this summer he will be living with us full time.  Because we only get him every other weekend I don’t really see any harm with getting him a new toy when he comes over as we always have two paychecks between his visits.  Therein lies the problem though.  Every weekend that he comes over since, well, before Christmas, he has gotten a new toy whenever he’s here.  Now he’s getting way too used to it.  God, parenting is hard.

He’s the sweetest thing though when he wants to be.  Key words: when he wants to be.  He can be a little turd at times and some of those times you just need to leave the room.  One example: when he argues with you.  When his only argument becomes the famous “I didn’t do it!” to no matter what you say to him, then you just need to send him to a time out and walk away.  I don’t know about anyone else but I get so irritated when someone argues with me without having any real point to their argument, and trust me, the last thing you want to do is to get angry at him when he’s done something wrong.  Keeping your cool is the way to get through to people.  If I get angry and yell, then that’s all that he will ever learn from me, and I definitely don’t want that.

I met this wonderful little boy when he was just four years old and have adored him since the first moment I laid my eyes on him, but that’s a story for a different day.  It has been a rather long day, but in a good way and I just put my child to bed.  I need to get myself to bed now because he will be up at the crack of dawn.  You know, I remember enjoying my sleep when I was a kid.

Good night all and have sweet dreams.

B. McDaniel